Practical Love

I had an observation today. After all this blog is about observing Love in the world and reporting it so we can practice it. You can disagree, as I have stated in the last post, I am no expert on Love. But, with practice, we can all be better at it. My observation is this: All people want to feel beautiful, loved and young. All marketing seems to point to these three pillars. Some people equate beauty with youth but they are far from being the same. Why is it that if a hundred people tell us that we are beautiful and one person tells us we are ugly that we believe the one and not the hundred? I have taken a number of arts and humanities classes and learned the same thing from every class. There is no ugly. God made all things. God knows no ugly. Everything is formed out of Love because God is Love. In the same vane, an artist creates art and that art is created out of love even if it is an expression of angst. I don't want to get into a discussion about art except to say tha...

I think it is hard to understand the concept of Love. We are told that God is Love and to love and that we are loved, but what is it? What does Love mean? I have been pondering this question, because it is so hard to fathom the depth of the meaning. And, of course, there are many contexts and meanings. It is a noun and a verb too. In the Christian Bible, in 1 Corinthians 13:4–8a , we read that "Love is patient, love is kind..." While this is beautiful and often said at weddings, it is less than tangible for us. I thought about this and how Jesus of Nazareth might have answered this question. He would have used analogy or parable to do it. "The kingdom of heaven is like..." So what is Love like? I like "water" to answer that question. So what if God was water? Love was water. I am not suggesting that he/she/it is water. This is analogy.  About water Every day we wake up and take a shower or go to the river to clean ourselves with water. This is comf...

Life is a matter of perspective. This is illustrated so beautifully in the TV show Downton Abbey, on PBS. For the two of you that have not seen this program (Mitt Romney, because it is on PBS and another guy), it is about aristocrats and their servants http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Downton_Abbey and you get to see both sides with their struggles and triumphs. Of course, they are very different. Another great cliché is that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Which simply means that we all have our own perspective and what it means to us is quite different. Most of what we hate about others comes from two places: 1) They are too different from us and 2) They are too similar to us. Think of the last time someone "wronged" you. It is either that they acted in a way that was different than you or what you would want from them. Or, they acted exactly like you and you hate that about yourself. My favorite act to talk about, because it is so universal...

Careful the things you say Children will listen Careful the things you do Children will see and learn Children may not obey, but children will listen Children will look to you for which way to turn To learn what to be Careful before you say "Listen to me" Children will listen Lyrics from "Children Will Listen" by Stephen Sondheim's " Into the Woods" I have an uncle who I always refer to as my favorite uncle. He and his wife both were my favorites and I have no idea why. I have a lot of relatives, why did they get the top spot? I remember them both for their warm and how they asked me about myself and payed attention to me, but I only remember one sound byte from my uncle, Lloyd Barron. We were walking together across the parking lot of St. Regis School. We had just got out of a  church function. I can't remember if it was a confirmation, graduation or a funeral. We were walking toward the Fr. Shield room at the school for a recepti...

Remember that scene in Star Wars: A New Hope (the original, first of the series well before JarJar Binks), where Obi Wan and Darth Vader are fighting and Obi Wan says, "You can't win, Darth. If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine." ?  Well, to remind you, Obi Wan allows himself to be struck down by Darth Vader, but disappears. We later find him talking to Luke in his head. Well, I believe that Love is like that. Obi Wan was Luke's spiritual teacher, coach and confidant. I don't think you can truly teach anyone without loving them first. Teaching is a form of Love. The wanting to raise your students to a new, smarter level is easily defined as Love. Not surprisingly, all the great spiritual leaders started as teachers. Jesus was called teacher by his disciples and continually taught. For a student to learn, they must Love their teacher. Not in the perverted sense that we see in a few headlines, but a respect ...

True Love gets a lot of fanfare on tv and movies. This notion that there is this ONE person out in a world of 7 billion people that is right for you, is such a romantic ideal. But for someone like myself who occasionally plays the Power Ball, with romantic ideas about becoming rich, I have come to realize the absurdity of the odds. If there is only one person for you then it is actually very tragic. I think it could also be very magical, if you are lucky like I am to have come together, against all odds, with the most beautiful, talented compliment to myself-my wife, Cory. We have been together for about 25 years now. Crazy. Wonderful. But as I watch my Mom who, after the death of my Dad, was able to fall in love again, I know that true Love is not about that ONE person. It is, however, about one person. That person is you. True Love resides within. Love must be cultivated. You water it. Feed it. Nurture it within yourself so that you can let it expand outside of yourself. That Lo...

My dad used to tell me that sin was based on intention. If you knowingly do something against God or God's will, it's a sin. I tell my kids that there are no bad words, just some ugly words that are made uglier by bad intentions. What is intention? Intention is a noun that means aim or plan. To intend then is to have (a course of action) as one's purpose or objective; plan. Planning takes forethought. I come from a long line of Barrons who have problems making plans, so I know that planning can take some work. I think it also comes from the idea that if you don't make plans, you can't have plans that fall through. But forethought and planning have a lot to do with Love. As sin is done with ill-intention, Love is done by good and honorable intention. You have to intend to do, show and feel Love. I find myself so self-involved some days that I am surprised by the presence of people around me, all of the sudden, when they have been there all the time.You have to b...

When does 1 + 1 = 1? When you are talking about love. Love is oneness. Love is a very esoteric concept, which is why I am writing this. But love is for everyone and should be a very exoteric concept. You don't have to be educated or rich to love. You are born in oneness. You are the product of 1 and 1 coming together. From your very conception, you are not alone. You, for nine months are actually physically inside your mother. The birthing process is a separation that makes us long for that closeness again. How do you explain what love is? Love has so many facets and nuances that it is hard to explain in words. "Love is all you need. Love is a many splendored thing. All is fair in love. Love conquers all. (Love) is an ever-fixed mark, that looks on tempests and is never shaken." Beautiful bumper stickers, for sure, but they don't explain anything. My definition is oneness. Think of the number 111 (one eleven). It is three numbers, equal in value. When you put them...

This is the title of one of my favorite books by Dr. Wayne Dyer and it was the theme of the homily at Easter mass. I always thought that this was a cool, new age, idea. But it turns out that Jesus taught that 2000 years ago. Jesus said to her, "Did I not say to you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?" John 11:40 Jesus said to him, "Because you have seen Me, have you believed? Blessed are they who did not see, and yet believed." ― John 20:29 “Truly I say to you, if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what was done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and cast into the sea,’ it will happen. “And all things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.” ― Matthew 21:21 “Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted you. ― Mark 11:24 This is basically the idea of the book, "The Secret" which is a recent,...

Today, I made a video in defense of Starbucks. I am a big coffee fan, but that is not why I did it. I found out that Starbucks has been getting backlash for openly supporting same-sex marriage. I also found out that it was their support that help solidify the legislation in Washington state. I try not to be political, but so many have politicized the gay marriage issue. I support the people. Which, by the way, sums up my political views. There are people, American citizens, that have needs and desires that can easily be met. These needs don't directly effect me. But when you single out groups that you will give or deny rights to based on your own views, it indirectly effects me and all of us. We have come to an age of information. We are now informed of all the things going on around the world. When we see atrocities around the world, we get incensed. And we should. We still have racial and sexual inequality in this informed world; in this informed country. Sometimes I get ...

Artists literally pour their hearts and souls into their work. When you draw or paint, your skin, oil, sweat can actually become part of the piece. But these pieces are their interpretations of the subject. Their imagination and experience coupled with their sight are manifested on their medium. Singers, songwriters, dancers and all performance artists put everything out on the line because they do it live while you watch. It is all the expression of their interpretations and experiences and they put a lot of themselves into the piece. Their own emotions, their own thoughts and their own bodies make it into the show. They invite you to come. They sit in the wings nervously. "Will they like me? Will I screw up? Did they come?" Art happens. You meet them at the stage door. So nervous, they leave their make-up on. "So...what did you -" they barely get out and you say, "You look pretty!" (insert 80s style needle scratch here). The performers all know tha...

I want to continue to talk about how God is Love . It is such a simple phrase. It makes a great bumper sticker. Seriously, language is so important probably because it can often be misinterpreted. There are 8 major translations of the original Bible over the years which have been translated into over two thousand language variations. There are hundreds of revisions to those bibles as well. The Catholic Church, this past year, changed much of the words used in the Mass on Sunday. I found a list that someone made of the names of God. They came up with 524. It seems that we are continually trying to get the words right. "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." John 1:1 "And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us." John 1:14 These are two interesting and simple quotes from the gospel of John. It seems that the Word is important. We also find in the gospel of John, "God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in Go...

I studied Hapkido for about five+ years and was always fascinated by the metaphysical aspect of the martial arts. The word "Hapkido" is Korean and means, "the way of coordinated power." Everything is circular and you use your ki or chi or lifeforce or strength to combine with your opponent's energy to redirect the force to your advantage. It is pretty cool. One popular martial art maxim is "be like water." I think Bruce lee explains it the best. Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way round or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water my friend. The "be like water" princ...

"PEOPLE REALLY PISS ME OFF!" Have you ever said/thought that? Some days it seems like the world is against us. But the truth of the matter is, the people in the world are not thinking about you much at all. That !@#$%^&*ing person that cut you off on freeway was just doing what they needed to do for themselves. The perception that the person was trying to maliciously scoot in front of you to cause you to slam on your brakes and threaten your life is no more true than the opposite of that. That is right. Both the worst truth and the best truth exist at the same time. Let me explain.Your experience of the truth happens entirely in your brain. You write a play, cast the characters, give them rich histories and endow them with emotions...in your mind. This happens with everything. Since you don't have all the facts, you fill in facts based on your experience, your instincts, your emotions. This is creative energy. Have you ever seen the test that looks like this: Aro...

Crying. Babies do a lot of crying. I remember my first experience with a crying baby. I had never watched a baby before, but my sister-in-law came to visit to help Cory buy a wedding dress. They left me with the baby. I was 22 years old and never held a baby before. I tried not to let on that I was terrified. She gave me some very simple advice that made it all sound so easy. If the baby cries, he only wants one of three things: food, potty or love. For food, here is a bottle. For potty, check his diaper. For love, hold, rock, talk sweet or if you just fed him, burp him. "I got this!" He cried for three hours straight as my head slowly split in two. I tried all three things in methodically monotony, one to the next, to the next, to the next, for three hours to no avail. I don't think I was adequately equipped for this ... as a man. Crying is not something we are taught to deal with. That is something to sweep under the rug. When you are young and a male, you cry and...

We just had Valentines Day. Woohoo! BTW Is there an apostrophe in Valentine's Day? Valentines' Day? Anyway, I have never been a fan of the day. I am of the "Hallmark Holiday" camp. Trumped up holiday to sell cards and flowers. But you can't write a blog about love and poo-poo the only internationally recognized day for demonstrative affection. You see the commercials; you hear the radio spots; there's a lot of pressure to be romantic. So what do you do. Send roses? A card? Give out Nerds, candy hearts? Chocolate?! I know, get your wife/girlfriend/mistress some lingerie! Thanks Victoria but the secret is already out. That is the gift you give yourself. So what is a lover to do about romance on a day like this? I read somewhere (probably a trashy men's magazine) that the way to a girl's heart is not all those things. Women like a little note that shows them that you were thinking of them. HUH? Yeah, that's right. You see we are talking about a wom...

Genevieve was being a grump. She was tired. Well she should have been, it was bedtime. Bedtime is always a struggle. I don't think my own parents would disagree with that. With seven kids, bedtime must have been torturous. Well, getting the girls to bed sometimes involves screaming (us at them) and sometimes I just grab them by the hand and walk them upstairs and step them through the process. This was not one of the hand holding nights. After fighting to get them upstairs, immediately we hear Genevieve screaming and crying. She was hurt. So we quickly run up the stairs, "What happened?" we exclaim. Only screams and crying could come out. "WHAT HAPPENED?" we say a little louder, as if that could jolt the explanation out over the tears. I suddenly had a flash! It was a memory, a feeling. I still cannot tell whether it was a memory of my Dad or my Mom or a combination of both. Empathy. My voice got higher as my body got lower to the ground. At her level, I c...

  Has anyone ever told you who you are or who you are NOT? Did you believe them? It occurred to me that we are all so effected by what people say - how people label us. Of course, my inspiration for this post was after watching The Matrix again. Because all my inspirations are from movies. Wait until I watch Fletch again. :) In the movie, Morpheus tells Neo that he is the "One" or the one to save the world. He starts to believe him even though he as no evidence to suggest he was the one. Then the Oracle tells Neo he is NOT the one. Now he believes her. Why? Because she is supposed to be the expert. She can foresee the future. It turns out (spoiler alert) he IS the "One." Another good example of the effects of this is illustrated in the TV show, Gilmore Girls. Rory is told by Mr. Huntzberger, the big newspaper man, that she doesn't have what it takes to be a newspaper editor. She quits Yale. So yes, my tastes run from The Matrix to Gilmore Girls, but ...

We don't always equate eating with love. Oh, many of us "love" eating, but how about preparing dinner for friends? There is nothing more lovely than to make a meal for someone. In my last post, my musing about love-only thoughts brought me to making breakfast. As a child, we take food for granted. "What are we having for dinner?" "Liver!" "Awwww, Mom! I eating at Larry's." Last night I attended a dinner party at my dear friends' house. We have gone to several of these 'wine-tasting' themed parties at their house. They are wonderful! With love on my mind, I saw this outing with new eyes. Two of the guests had brought martini makings. Molly and Tom had planned a unique recipe. Molly volunteered to alter the drink in any way that might be more pleasing-more alcohol, less, etc. Meanwhile, Tom was carefully threading candied ginger, a peeled slice of lime and a leaf of basil on a paper umbrella to garnish the drink. The two of ...

You ever wonder how you would be if love was all you knew? I am going to do that right now. So, starting in the morning, I wake up and think about how lucky I am to be alive. I desperately spring to my feet to find Cory and Celia and Genevieve. How beautiful they look. As my heart is racing, I wonder, what can I do for them. I could let them sleep because they look so angelic. Maybe I should go and make them breakfast, so they awake with the smell of pancakes wafting up the stairs. So I go downstairs and open the shades to let the light in. I pull together all the ingredients for pancakes, especially the chocolate chips and quiet as a mouse, I start cooking. Sure enough, it works like a charm, because just as I set the steaming pancakes on the table, three blurry-eyed girls wander into the breakfast area. Cory's face blossoms into a smile and quietly exclaims, "You made pancakes." I could go on (should for my own sake) but you get it. It is easy to imagine love with y...